Taking Things in Hand
Ensconced in the Erotica bar I relaxed, took a swig of beer knocking back the other half of Cialis and looked around. It is not a very special bar, somewhat hidden away in one of the corners of the second floor of Nana Plaza. It has seen better days and I think it used too have two floors, one possibly with a glass floor. It might have had, in the past, an unsavoury reputation. How can a strip club/bordello have an unsavoury reputation you might well ask? Due to heavy handed, aggressive bouncers possibly. But this trait was not in evidence the night I was there: quite the opposite in fact as I will relate shortly.
There are some dirty up for it girls at Erotica. I was there when two of my pals barfined a couple and took the pair back to the Nanatai Hotel Mansions. This is a hotel and condominium block, a long way up the Soi. If you have not booked a room in advance at The Nana Hotel and it is full, which it usually is, the Nana staff can arrange a lift to this other hotel using the Nanatai official tuk tuk. I think they are related; the hotels not the girls. I do not know how dirty the girls were before my pals took them back but they pilled them up till they rattled and they all screwed like fevered cobras that night. I had given my friends two packets of Kamagra the fast acting jelly paste/form of Viagra which they were trying for the first time whilst on other “enhancements”. I had stopped using Kamagra some time ago as I found it triggered off my sinuses. I felt a bit sorry for the girls.
On that particular occasion I had ‘made my excuses and left’ early with no girl but was confident I could find a girl later on the street or at a Coyote bar that stayed open late, This Soi Sii Coyote bar, which stayed open very late and had a concrete roof garden bar used to exist a few hundred yards past the Hilary bar, on the right with Soi six on the left just opposite. It may have since opened again in the same area. But that night the old bill had done a sweep, closed it early and driven most of the girls off the street. Imagine that! It was about 3am and there were no crowds of girls outside the NH car park! There were very few attractive girls round but I took the best I could find.
As well as being a bit of a laugh and quite attractive, Oi was sexually proficient, eccentric, spoke very good English and could accurately replicate a number of British regional accents, not least of all a thick Glaswegian accent! A bit scary actually.
After a blowjob, when we were having a bath together, bathing together is part of my Modus Operandi by the way, she shaved me! And I don’t mean my face! She removed all my hair from down there! From my balls, dick, lower abdomen and pubic area- all off with a plastic Bic. She did it efficiently and quickly all the time nursing my second erection. Once she started I could not stop her as it would have been like walking around with just half a moustache and more importantly, she might have stopped fondling my dick. I was dreading the anticipated itchy discomfort when the hair grew back in the future but in the end accepted it, got used to and I noticed that most Thai girls like the smooth unshaven look. And of course it makes my dick look bigger. When Oi had finished shaving me I was horney enough to shag again and she made me come. The next time I was to be shaved would be about two years later, as a punishment, by a beautiful BDSM mistress who works at a dungeon in the Bangkok suburbs.
Oi stayed over night and wanked me in the morning. I was staying in one of the large ‘suites’ in the Nana Hotel for which I paid about 1900 baht. They are quite fun with an oddly decorated support pillar covered with varnished pebbles. I paid Oi 2000 baht or 2500 baht. I took her phone number and had her again in the next few days but she bled on the bed which I just cannot abide. If I wanted to sleep with slovenly bleeders I would have got married to an English girl.…..
It was with these thoughts on my mind that I found myself, back in the Erotica Go Go bar, cupping a heavy breast with one hand, holding a bottle of beer in the other, looking into the middle distance where the topless girls were dancing on the nearby stage. I was glad they were not wearing insulating tape pasties over their nipples, which I might have seen at this place in the past, and I was checking the level of nudity, full or otherwise when a shocking thing happened.
A guy next to me, light skinned black American, for the record, produced a small silver digital camera and casually started photographing the dancing girls. Within seconds the girls had informed the youthful mamasan who came over and remonstrated with him and asked for the camera. The girls just carried on dancing but he refused to hand over the camera saying he had done nothing wrong. The patient mamasan explained that she would like to check his camera. He refused and said his camera was private. She insisted. He refused. I watched in fascinated terror knowing what was coming. I could read his casual dismissive body language. I could hear snatches of conversation as he argued with her. I could see and hear the young, not battle axe old, mamasan trying to reason with him. He offered to go. She said he couldn’t leave. At this point I was about to join in and advise him of the likely outcome of this situation if he did not cooperate. I had seen a guy, who had been taking photographs, beaten up really badly in the NP courtyard a few years ago and it was not a pretty sight. I was going to try and explain about the girls needing privacy by appealing to this guy’s sense of decorum with the line: “Hey man, chillax, imagine if it was your daughter up there on the stage.” Then I thought to myself: ‘Fuck it I’ll just hang out and watch the inevitable beating.’ I was so tired of his weasel words, dissembling and disingenuous nature that I felt like glassing him myself. I mean imagine if it was my daughter dancing naked up on the stage being photographed by a total stranger!
A Thai guy came in, an off duty cop for sure, moonlighting as door security I guess, I dunno maybe owned the place. I moved out of the blood splash zone, ordered another beer for myself, my girl and the service girl. The Thai guy was speaking softly and the errant snapper was still not yielding. The mamasan was still asking for the camera. My girl whispered that the Thai guy was indeed a policeman. The situation carried on for about fifteen minutes until they seem to come to some kind of deal that the mamasan would check all the pics in the camera and selectively delete the pics taken in the Go Go. And that is what happened! What an anti-climax. While the two guys, the Thai and the American eyed each other across the table, the mamasan checked and clicked her way through his camera. She returned the camera. The American left and the bouncer/policeman disappeared. I would like to think the guy got a good spanking later that night when further away from the premises.
But regarding the possibly unsavoury reputation of the staff at Erotica I saw no such thing. They were polite, gentle, non confrontational, Thai style, to an extreme degree. The twat in question had broken my patience within minutes. Just a well that I don’t run the door at such places I guess. You might wonder at my racial based description of him. Well if you ever hear of him or see him doing the same thing you can be sure he is not an innocent naïf but a cold hustler who deserves a slapping for his snapping.
I left Erotica without my tit wank. The girl I had had intended to service me had not been there. The mammary protuberances I had been kneading had been a mere substitute. I decided to go to Morning Night bar.
This bar, the first on your left when you enter Soi Sii is opposite a small chemist and a Taxi motor bike stand. Being near the entrance to both the Nana car park and the Nana plaza it is a useful place to watch a wide range of exotic, erotic, young beautiful, Thai Bar girls disappearing into the night with their smug Japanese customers as they head off to all expense-account paid five star hotels. It is a good place for ‘Follow that arse’ and I have seriously considered stalking a girl with her Japanese customer all the way to hotel to see if I could pick up on some sloppy seconds either that night or the morning after. On a couple of occasions I have indeed propositioned beautiful girls coming out of hotel bedrooms and following them to the lobby/exit of the hotel. On other occasions I wish I had. For those of you concerned with etiquette I would like to assure you that there is no rule that ‘Follow that arse’ has to be started from a stationary position.
I bar fined a girl from the Morning Night one time, about 500 baht a day to the bar and I paid her 1500 -2500 baht per day. I took her for one week for a trip to Phuket. I don’t rate Phuket and consider it a Girl Free Zone full of Lady Boys and gangs of drunk farang guys looking for a fight. So I took my pleasure with me to save time. She was OK and I liked her but she was sexually dutiful more than anything else. Yeah. Her professionalism in bed was border line dutiful. We stopped seeing each other. I think she had a farang and a Thai boyfriend. I still continued going to the Morning Night bar. She went back to working with her step-mum and neurotic depressed gatoey cousin on a street bar around Soi 11 where I had originally met her in the early hours of the morning after a night out at Soi Cowboy.
I often check out the Morning Night bar but like the Hilary 2 it can get a bit claustrophobic with mean drunks and indifferent girls. Also the music can be too loud. And where I like to sit is where the lazy girls sit smoking and I do not like smoke. Although it is not dear it is not cheap and with Sol at 160 baht a bottle it is not value for money. (I thought I was ordering San Miguel.) I can understand why people who live in Bangkok do not patronise bars such as Hilary and Morning Night. They are transients oriented and do not really have a ‘local bar’ feel. But they have their merits. I go there regularly as I know one of the bar girls there. I have never barfined her nor will I ever but I buy her a few drinks and we chat and she tries to fix me up with girls from whom I cop a few feels and goose front and back. As well as case hardened bar girls, there are a few transient, naïve young country girls at Morning Night and a few cherries to be broken, some plump and homely girls, and maybe potential wives to be married by anyone foolish enough to marry a Sukhumvit girl.
I had just really dropped by to pick up my Sek Loso ticket from my friend but stuck around for few drinks. I also asked her why she hadn’t tried harder to track down Miss Au for me as it was clear she had made little effort but I did not really mind. She told me some news about recent customers, fucked her so hard and long she could barely walk, had had to give a blow job which she hated, and the fact that her house in Issan had just burned down. She has an odd list to her body and tilt to her neck due to a past motor cycle accident. When Morning Night is good it is OK but when it is bad it is awful and that night I left after the DJ started fucking around with the music, turning it on and off, raising and lowering the volume and if there is anything more guaranteed to expedite my quick exit from a bar it is Freddie fucking Mercury and Queen. Suffering Jesus. Here in the great sandpit every half arsed, crap cover band, usually comprising the ubiquitous multi talented but devastatingly unoriginal Philippino long haired shower always play clichéd covers of Queen, a band which I hated in the first place.
Driven out of Morning Night, I left Soi Sii, turned right on to Sukhumvit walking to The Huntsman Pub located in the basement of the Landmark Plaza. They have excellent pork ribs, 180 baht for half a large rack, none of that gay ‘baby back’ nonsense. The portions are big and the accompanying fries, coleslaw and the trimmings are more than sufficient to make a full rack of ribs redundant. There is also Belgium beer, pretty Beer girls and waitresses all in salubrious surroundings. They do a ‘two for the price of one happy hour’ on the beers, deadly if you are drinking the Belgium beer. The pub also has lots of newspapers and a smoking and non smoking area. The only draw back is the Philippino band but that is more than made up for by the fact this pub is never too busy and is blessedly untrendy. Oh, and service is brisk, efficient and friendly.
During the day on this stretch of Sukhumvit, in the hundred yards walk to the Landmark Plaza, there are many stalls selling second hand books; souvenirs; T shirts, and other clothes; bric a brac; including the usual weird paraphernalia of night stalking and extreme violence. The latter includes night vision goggles; telescopes; knuckle dusters, martial arts weapons such as shuriken, electric stun batons, switch blades; flick knives; and one of my own weapons of choice: a razor sharp knife disguised as a pen. This is also where the excellent local post office provides fast, efficient, cheap postal services including wrapping and packing. There is a hotel, Majestic that looks OK, but not for me – not sleazy enough or anonymous enough. The place has a restaurant which has some good photographs of steaks. There are also two tailors, one, Majestic Tailors, which makes suits for Rumsfeld and the Bushes I believe. Also included in the range of stalls in this short stretch of road is one selling beach-ware and one concerned with philately.
But at night all these stalls wind down to be replaced by erect-a-bars complete with opticals, ice buckets, and a wide range of alcoholic beverages. Tables and chairs are provided. I enjoy drinking at such street bars which, on the other side of the road, stretch from Sukhumit Soi 3/1 all the way to Soi Cowboy: Instead of just observing the street theatre one becomes part of it rather like a character in a nineteenth century impressionist painting of Paris. You can eat at these bars and there are usually plenty of girls from ten o’clock at night to about four or five the following morning. There is no bar fine. After 2am girls from beer bars, Go Gos, and freelancers from places like The Thermea relax, gossip, eat, drink, chat and are a valuable source of sexual research.
On this part of Sukhumvit the first bar is inhabited by staff who are ladyboys dressed in cocktail gowns so I decided to have a drink at another bar, the nearest bar to The Landmark Plaza. It is nearby the steps that lead up to the Chinese Restaurant at the base of the hotel. I sat and chatted to two girls, one who was very attractive and dressed in a simple elegant Italian silk LBD. She spoke excellent English with an American accent and told me that she was broke, was divorced from a rich American who had bought a lot of land in Cambodia years ago who was now making a lot of money growing either rice or Johoba. She had lived in Cambodia with him but now lived in Bangkok. I told her that she could take him for half of his money under USA law but she didn’t seem interested. I was considering hiring her for sexual research purposes but she was too westernised for my taste, spoke too good English and I guessed she might knock me back as I wasn’t too sure if she was selling herself, least of all to the likes of me. I stayed talking for half an hour. I saw her later that night walking down Sukhumvit with a young handsome Mediterranean looking guy. Italian twat!
Eventually I went to the Chinese restaurant where I had wind dried smoked sausages, minced pork and minced prawn steamed dumplings and noodle soup topped with slices of roast duck and barbecued pork. The waiter recognised me and remembered my choice of food from previous visits. The wind dried sausages, salty and gamey are an excellent nibble when drinking beer or if you are broke a little sausage sliced into bland rice imparts a lot of flavour. They also seem to be an excellent cure for constipation as I always seem to have gut draining diaherria the morning after eating at this place. The food was about 300 baht and the beer was about 90 baht.
This place is one of my favourite all night eating venues near Soi 4. One thing that perturbs me about Bangkok is the early closing times of the restaurants and, excluding street stalls, the dearth of late night or all night restaurants. I chatted to the pretty waitress who was absorbed in a televised football match so was too busy to talk to me. When she did talk she talked about football. She was a dedicated West Ham supporter, oh for fucks sake.
I made my way back to The Plaza and up to Hollywood Carousel. Dao was not around, probably just as well but there were some sexy girls in evidence. I bought drinks for two girls who I had known before. They drank tequila as their lady drink and I drank Sangsom and soda with a beer chaser. The girls were in a playful mood both playing with each other and playing with me. One was very attractive. One was quite attractive. They went off to dance but came back very quickly as if they did not feel like dancing and were not being forced too. On and off for an hour we indulged in a variety of forms or frottage and I had their tits out of their bras and my fingers up their arse and pussies and thought about bar-fining one or both of them at 600 baht a pop. But I did not. I expect they would have been energetic good fun but I was not sure If I had the mental and physical energy for a ‘twos up’ session. I was so knackered I could barely wank myself off. I had a really great time which I usually do at the Hollywood Carousel. It is such a relief to be in Bangkok after months on duty in the sandy wastelands of the Middle East. The girls at this Go Go often seem horned up and friendly. There is also a wide selection of girls with a variety of body types, skin tones, breast size, labia shapes plus fairly good shows and performances so it is a good reliable fall back. I have only barfined one girl, Dao, from the place though I did see a Girl called Pim on the front carousel.
In a country famous for its smiles Pim has the biggest smile I have ever seen. Quite extraordinary actually. Like the grin on a Halloween lantern. A massive self effacing smile as though she was blushing and laughing at herself She is tall with long legs and her tiny inner pussy lips protrude slightly, like a tiny purple tongue sticking out, framed by her outer labia. She has a nicely styled haircut. I had fucked her once in the short time room of a bar called Midnight Hour on Soi cowboy where she was working as service girl dressed in school uniform style pleated skirt and blouse. She was wiping the stage and dancing poles down and I had a very satisfactory look at her long legs that went all the way up to the right places. She had neat small arse clad in smooth white cotton. I bought her a lady drink, flirted with her, put my hands up her skirt, examined her underwear and paid the bar fine for a short time. She tried to cheat me on the change when I paid her bar fine and bill which irritated me but we resolved the problem before negotiating the hazardous winding metal staircase near the front of the bar on the left. We entered the scruffy upstairs short time room and saying she was ‘see ow’ she undid my trousers, pulled my cock out and sucked whilst rubbing herself between her legs. I lay down on the bed and had her sit on my face whilst she sucked me. I was naked by now but she was still dressed. I pulled her pants to one side so the tip of my tongue parted her inner lips that were protruding out of her outer lips. She moaned a lot and jumped off me wailing for a condom. She rubbered me up and mounted me all the time talking about ‘see ow’. She, I think, came first then I did. She may have been a tad insane. We did not have much time for rest and recuperation before she started talking about her work and started gathering up the bedding. We showered together in a grubby toilet shower cubicle combined and then got dressed. I think her bar fine was 800 baht which I think is a bit cheeky for an ‘in house short time’. I think I paid 300 baht for the room and gave her 1500 Baht. She had told me before, when we were downstairs, that she had spent some time in Switzerland and that her sister was still there. It was unclear whether they worked as au pairs or prostitutes or both. As she gathered up piles of linen and bedding for the laundry she indicated she had to work too hard for too little money and was thinking of going back to Switzerland so I was surprised to see her that night in the Hollywood. I thought about waiting to chat to her but she seemed to be with some swarthy chap so I didn’t bother. Greek twat!
Anyway I was tired and decided to call it a night. I left the bar wending my way down stairs to the Plaza and out to the street. My plane had touched down 7am Bangkok time and it was now well after midnight. Although I had not done much in the intervening 17 hours I was a tired. Unless drinking, walking, talking, shagging, stalking, groping, and eating count as doing anything. I was hornier than ever though and was considering a street trawl when I remembered the business card from Charmming Massage with the name of the girl on it: Nim I think. I called from the street on my mobile and the Mamasan answered and said Nim might be available, as she had actually just finished work. I gave the name and room number of my hotel, only 5 minutes walk from the massage parlour and the mamasan said Nim would be around in 20 minutes. I returned to the hotel and on my way did not stop to dawdle but briefly checked out the breakfast menu at Chequers, Joolz and one or two other places. I noted as always the weird selection of black socked girls, lady boys and pregnant women outside on the steps of Avira massage. I have actually been there once and was to use it again on this trip.
I was fairly philosophical about the outcome of this arrangement with Nim and knew she might not turn up or might be late so once in my hotel room I dropped 10 mg valium and 50 mg of Diphenhydramine hydrochloride: a sleeping potion. The rational behind this action was that if Nim did not turn up I would get to sleep easily and if she did turn up but very late I would be asleep and not use her services. I stored my wallet and other valuables in the safe but put some money aside for payment. Then I ran a bubble bath and wallowed drowsily. I was pleasantly surprised when, after about ten minutes the receptionist telephoned to inform me I had a visitor.
Nim arrived and I did my best to put her at her ease, and succeeded. I was hoping for a sexually stimulating massage with a happy ending but would have accepted anything really. I asked her for a two hour massage but knew she wouldn’t. It was nearly 1am, then I asked her for a one-and-a-half-hour massage but she apologised and said it was late and we settled for a one hour massage: half hour Thai style and half hour oil. Nim was sweet, slim, and fine boned, with full sensual lips as I have described at the end of part one of this trip report. She was dressed in a tee shirt and jeans and was pretty, fresh and wholesome. The cartoon picture on her T shirt made her look young. She told me she was nineteen years. I spoke Thai. I told her I was 21. I told her I worked in Arabland where the men have big smelly beards and the women have big moustaches. I told her: Mai mi poo ying suway, mai mi whiskey, mai mi sanuk! (No beautiful girls, no whiskey, no fun) and Kaak kohn Boom boom gae! (Arabs fuck sheep). After a few minutes of this babbling she was amused and relaxed and knew I was just a harmless, old, lonely fool. I took the towel from across my shoulders and removed the one from around my hips. I casually used my erect cock as a towel hanger draping the towel from my dick which was fully erect and angled like a Nazi salute. I gave her my other towel to put on the bed. I turned modestly, removed my dick towel and lay face down on the towel on the bed ensuring my cock and balls were tucked downwards in full view and within easy or accidental access of her soft oily hands. She gave me a soft gentle Thai massage and we chatted. Her hand knowingly brushed my nether regions but she did not ‘work’ them. I sighed with pleasure. After about half and hour she indicated it was time to turn over so I made a decision to throw modesty to the winds and turned over naked my cock rising from the fleshy folds of my pale loins like a broken bratwurst. She started the oil massage and as she got to the top of my legs I explained that I wanted her to massage between my legs and massage my balls. I felt she might not be responsive to finger fucking my arse but I showed her where to press firmly between my legs and as she did so I twitched my cock in approval. At this point she asked me if I wanted a massage ‘there’ touching my cock. I frowned, pretended to think about it then reluctantly agreed. We arranged a price. I cannot remember exactly but I think the fee for the massage and visit was about five or six hundred baht and we arranged about the same for the hand job. I asked for her to take off her T shirt and bra and she agreed after a bit of thought. I poured out a small Bowmore’s and ice and offered her some. She seemed shocked. I sensed she was a ‘good girl’ but I hoped at some time in the future to do deeper sexual research with her. She leaned over in concentration as she rotated her oil soaked hand round the head of my cock. Her long, nearly hip length hair, fell over her firm 32A breasts which were shaped like champagne glasses tipped by rose soft pink nipples. I gently stroked her nipples with back of my hand and moved her long hair away to see her breasts more clearly. I guided her hand to press between my legs every so often. She took her time as we had agreed before on a ‘shakwow cha cha’ (A slow wank). She was slow, methodical and patient but after about fifteen minutes I could not hold out. I smiled as I, or rather she eventually hit my vinegar strokes and I ejaculated incontinently thick, white, cloudy, warm sauterne. To ensure she did not stop too soon I pumped my hips gently until I had nothing left to come out and both my orgasm and ejaculation were complete. I refused the offer of a tissue as I hate the way they break and flake leaving confetti around my glans. I just dried off with a towel. She got dressed and I paid her adding an extra hundred or two to the agreed price and I told her she was a very good girl. I told her I would see her tomorrow. She left and as I drifted off to sleep I thought about my hospital visit tomorrow, no not tomorrow, today in fact, in 12 hours. My first day in Bangkok had finished and as I drifted off to sleep I remembered that I must book my tickets to Mai Sot and Mai tomorrow.
To be continued…