A First-Timer’s Look at Chiang Mai by Werewolf

Okay, let’s get the caveats out of the way up front. I still remember my first week in Bangkok . If I wrote a summary of that city after being there for four and a half days my thoughts would have been incomplete, incorrect and largely invalid. (oddly, I was keeping a diary of my holiday on-line, so I really can go back and see what I had to say).

A month ago, I had never been to the north of Thailand . Three weeks ago I had never been to Chiang Mai. That changed in June; I have now spent 4 weeks in Northern Thailand and 4 ½ days in the city of Chiang Mai .

People like me who visit Bangkok for the first time tend to stay in a few small areas like Nana, Patpong and Soi Cowboy. Based on information from the internet I’ve done much the same in Chiang Mai… I’ve stayed where the farangs stay and I’ve gone to the places where farang (tourists) go.

So – argue and criticize all you want to – this isn’t the ‒Users Guide to Chiang Mai” but the ‒First Timer’s Look at Chiang Mai”. It’s the impression of the uninformed. If you want to comment and say I’m wrong, that’s fine – but don’t just tell me I’m an idiot — tell me what I can do better on my NEXT trip to Chiang Mai.

Alright. Caveats finished. On with the blog.

Chiang Mai is in the mountains. The entire area is more beautiful than central Thailand (ie. Bangkok and surrounds). That’s a fact.

Northern Girls

Let’s piss everyone off royally by starting with the myth-busting part of the blog. For three years I’ve been hearing stories from Thais and farang alike about the fact that in northern Thailand the girls are taller, lighter skinned and more beautiful. Basically I had the impression that I was traveling to a land of gorgeous Amazons… in my imagination I pictured Sirens of such beauty and grace that I would never return to the real world.

The truth?

In Chiang Rai the girls are no different from any other place I’ve been in Thailand (and I’ve been around a bit). In fact, I’d say they were in the bottom 50%.

In Chiang Mai, at first I thought the myth was still a total fantasy, but then I went to the Sunday night market (bazaar) near Tha Pae Gate. There are thousands and thousands of people at the bazaar, so I had a huge sample of the population. It’s difficult to describe in just a few words how big the bazaar is and how popular, but I would have passed ten thousand people in the two hours I spent walking around the market.

I was looking intently at the girls of Chiang Mai.

Are they taller?

On the whole, they are. Take a hundred girls from Chiang Mai and line them up next to a hundred Thai girls from a different part of the country, and I suspect that on average they may be as much as 5 cm taller. Mythbusters report: plausible.

Are they lighter skinned?

Okay, first of all, to me lighter skinned doesn’t equal more beautiful… in fact he opposite is true. But, there’s a factual question on the table. My conclusion, based on observation is that there’s may be a GENETIC difference in skin color here, but there may be an actual difference because we’re in the mountains. ‘Cold’ isn’t the right word, but it’s cooler here. People walk around with jackets on at night. Girls may be lighter skinned, but it looks to me like the issue could be explained as mountain girls who don’t get a lot of sun. Could I be wrong? Sure. But I think the white-skinned thing is really just a living-in-the-mountains thing,.

Are they more lovely?

Okay, I have a large sample size here. I’ve been to markets, shopping centers, bars, go gos, and offices over the past four weeks. I feel pretty confident about this.

My answer is completely, emphatically: NO. The girls up here are NOT more beautiful or lovely. They are a pretty average bunch.

I can hear the howls of protest even while I’m typing. Here’s what I have to say to you. If you live in Chiang Mai, you know more than I do… howl away. If you live in Bangkok , then I want to share the newly formulated Werewolf’s theory of gravitation.

The Werewolf Theory on Bangkok

I believe that Bangkok is like other big cities in the world, but let’s use LA in California as the most obvious prototype.

Girls all over America who are pretty or have a little bit of talent head to LA. It has a certain gravitational pull that attracts most of the most beautiful girls in the country, who all dream of being models, singers, actresses.. whatever.

Bangkok is the same kind of girl magnet. Every pretty girl spends her teenage years hearing the refrain: ‒you’re so beautiful… you should go to Bangkok and work. You could make a fortune or get a rich farang husband”

Whether they are from Udon Thani, Chiang Mai or Burriram, the most appealing girls head off to the big city to follow their dreams.

So if you live in Bangkok , and you want to tell me about Chiang Mai girls, here’s what I’ll tell you. Yep… you’re girl is probably taller that most other girls. You may know several beautiful girls from Chiang Mai, but I think it’s the Bangkok effect #2 (I’ll explain Bangkok Effect #1 later)… in other words, you’re seeing the beautiful girls who have been drawn to Bangkok by the same gravitational force that draws all the beautiful girls to LA. But here in Chiang Mai & Chiang Rai the girls are generally not so beautiful, and girl for girl, don’t come close to the beauty seen daily on the streets, trains and offices of Bangkok .

Enough of that. Let’s change tack.

What to do in Chiang Mai

There’s a lot to do in Chiang Mai. It’s not a boring city (unlike Chiang Rai, which is really a small town). I’ve seen just a little bit of what’s on offer, and less than I could have, since I’ve gone to most places twice in the few days I’ve spent in town.

I’ve spent all my time in places frequented by farang, driven primarily by what I’ve read on the internet. My time here has been in two parts. The first time I spent three days here with a girl (a traveling companion from Bangkok ). Currently, I’m on the third day of a five day visit, spending time with a friend from California who is here for the first time.

I’ve eaten in a few restaurants, with very little to report except to comment on Mike’s Burger place. Mike’s opened on Silom Road in Bangkok a few months ago and closed very quickly. Don’t know what happened there, but I visited Mike’s here on my first visit and it was great. Hot dogs, hamburger and the like. Very American. Recommended.

Go Go Bars

I’ve found two go go bars in town, Foxy Lady and Spotlight. If there are others I haven’t seen them. They are both small, but decent quality places. Foxy Lady had one beautiful girl and a lot of average ones. The night I was there the beauty had a customer already, and he barfined her. I bought drinks for another girl, but it turned out that I hated her. She got lipstick all over my brand new shirt, she bit me, kept grabbing my cock, playing with my nipples and she tried to dance sexily, but in reality just assaulted me with her ass, pushing my stool backwards several feet as she tried to turn me on with her dance moves.

Spotlight was much the same. There was a service girl at Spotlight that caught my attention. I couldn’t get her to go with me on my first night there. I went back last night and was chatting her up, and was at the point where I was suggesting going out together. She was being a bit coy. I went to the toilet, and when I returned, she apologized because in the two minutes I’d been gone she’d been barfined by the other guy who’d been chatting her up. Now I know why she was being coy… he was a lot better looking than me. Not to worry. You never lose your girl, just your place in line. I’ll go back and get her tonight.

(Late edit: I got back to spotlight on Sunday and was successful. Here’s what I wrote in an email to Smitty tonight:

(I pulled the service girl from Spotlight tonight… the kind I like… 37 kilos with a great smile and fantastic attitude.

It was probably the best fuck I’ve had in years! I think she enjoyed it too — she asked me to come back tomorrow and take her out again.

I’m seeing Chiang Mai a lot more positively now!

After tonight I’m not missing Bangkok as much as I had been, but I’ll be glad to get back next week. I may invite the Chiang Mai service girl to come visit.

I also went to the massage place again today and got washed and fucked. It was okay but 2K for an average time with a sideliner versus 1K for the spinner service girl puts it all in some perspective. I tried to get her to go with me the two previous nights and didn’t manage it… I regret the 4K for the two massage girls now. I’d rather have given it to the service girl.

Do I sound obsessed?)

While I’m talking about Spotlight, let me go back to something I said earlier. I said that I’d explain ‒The Bangkok Effect”.

The Bangkok Effect

Here’s my theory, built on years of observation, illustrated by a real life example.

On Friday night, my friend and I were in the Spotlight Go Go bar. He pointed to a girl dancing in a bikini and said that she was beautiful. I looked at her and it was true that her face would have qualified her to grace the cover of any magazine in the world. She was absolutely lovely.

I can also say that from her knees down she had lovely and graceful legs, but in the middle, her hips were wide.

This wasn’t a fat girl – no excess kilos at all – she just had a substantial ass, large thighs and wide hips. If that’s your thing, then I know the perfect girl for you, but I like my women tiny and slender, so I answered my buddy flippantly ‒She’s fat” I said.

She wasn’t fat. I’m fat. She had a big ass.

But this is the Bangkok Effect in action. I went back to Spotlight for a while last night and saw the girl again (Oddly, she was wearing badge number 57 on Friday night but #38 on Saturday). Her face was the same vision of loveliness that I remembered. Watching her dance, she had a special way of moving with a subtle little pelvic thrust that was especially erotic. But I just couldn’t get past that massive ass.

Here’s the thing… if I was in New York or Rome or Melbourne and this girl told me what time it was, I’d probably walk around on cloud 9 all day because such a beautiful woman told me what time it was. But, after living in Bangkok for three years, faced with the possibility of having sex with her, my only response was to complain that her ass was too big.

That’s the Bangkok Effect. You lose perspective on how challenging it is in the rest of the world to have sex with beautiful women. In Bangkok, because it’s set up like a department store for girl-shopping, you can just look around until you find the one that fits your specs precisely, then hire her for an hour or a week. Whatever Bangkok may lack in other areas, the sheer QUANTITY of Thai girls available for short-time hire is astounding.

Chiang Mai has less quantity, but there’s enough selection for the city to be interesting.

Sexy Massage

My buddy from California and I decided to hit the massage shops. We were thinking soapy, but that wasn’t on offer. In Bangkok it seems like the best time to hit the massage places is the afternoon, so we went off yesterday after lunch time to try to get in trouble. Based on what I’d read on the internet it seemed like the best choice would be Chiang Mai Massage next to the Phucome Hotel.

We arrived at 1 pm. There were five girls, none appealing. We asked the papasan what the story was. He said that they would have 20 girls on later, but it was very early now. He told me that 7 p.m. would be the best time to come back.

I actually plan on returning, but yesterday we decided to simply move on and try our luck at a different shop. We went to Porn Phayom on Suithep Road. We got there at 2 pm and there were 5 girls on. We sat and had a drink, and by 3 pm there were 20 girls in the fishbowl.

The girls in the middle were the ‘normal’ girls; 1,300 baht.

The girls on the left had an ‒L” on their badge, and the price was 1,600 baht. When I asked the papasan about the ‒L” he put his hand over his crotch and said ‒yai” which I took to be the word for ‘large’ but with Thai being a tonal language, it could have meant anything. I asked if ‒L” meant ladyboy and he quickly said no. I still don’t know what the L signified.

The girls on the right had an ‒S” on the badge and cost 2,000 baht. These were the Sideline girls.

I spotted a sideliner that caught my attention (#30) and the papasan was very enthusiastic about her. My buddy was having a hard time finding a girl who interested him, so I suggested we just leave, but I think he knew I was interested in #30 so he wanted to find a girl for my sake. He finally decided on a girl who had some large and natural titties. The papasan said she was new, and looked a little skeptical, but my buddy simply didn’t find any of the other girls appealing.

Between 2 and 3 pm the girls were coming into work, one at a time, so every few minutes there was a new one in the fish bowl. Just before we finalized arrangements, a girl came in with an ‒L” tag (#17) who was stunningly beautiful. My buddy and I both agreed that she was magazine-model beautiful. I asked the papasan about her compared to #30. He said she was new, and again recommended #30.

We finalized the deal… I took #30 and my friend took big-tits, leaving the stunning beauty sitting in the fishbowl.

My girl told me in the room that she was 19 years old, that she was 39 kilos, and that she had been working for 5 months at the massage shop. She said that she used to work in a restaurant as a waitress before. She didn’t speak a word of English, so we chatted in Thai. My friend doesn’t speak any Thai, and his girl didn’t speak English either. My girl said that it wouldn’t be any problem.

My buddy and I compared notes afterwards, and it seems that there is a specific formula for the service. The girl fills a large bath with warm water and watches TV with you while it fills. My girl gave me a hand massage, but my buddy said his girl sat stupidly while the bath filled. Then comes the bath. My girl pampered me in the bath… my friend reported that his girls scrubbed him quickly. Next is a quick towel and into the bed for a covered blow job.

I told my girl I wanted my BJ uncovered and she complied for about a minute. My buddy had the raincoat for the full time.

Next is the sex. My sideliner kept me on my back while she tried to slide down on top of me. I’m not endowed like a horse or a porn star, but my manhood was FAR too much for my little 39 kilo girl to handle. She had a very hard time fitting me in the available space. I put her on her back to make things move along and a look of terror came across her face. She put her hands up to try to push me back. I was gentle but insistent. She was tiny and I put a hand on each hip and held her up off the bed easily, and finished quickly. It was a bit like having sex with a doll – she was so tiny that I could hold her completely off the bed and just bounce her up and down. She looked both pained and pleased by the proceedings. At the end, while dressing, she told me that her tummy hurt now. Oh well.

After the boom-boom she gave me a light massage and I actually fell asleep.

My buddy reported that after his covered blow job his girl fell onto her back with her arms and legs spread and a look of terror on her face. He said he simply removed the condom and got dressed without even trying to have sex with her. He wasn’t angry, but disappointed. He said he’d never understood the term ‘starfish’ before.

Overall, I’d say the service from my girl was ‘average’. Given that my pal and I had both paid the premium for sideline girls this is particularly disappointing, but for 2,000 baht it wasn’t tragic for me. I may even go back before my trip is done to see if the stunningly beautiful #17 is worth her 1,600 baht price tag, and I’ll almost certainly go back to try the place near the Phucome hotel, which got much better reports on the internet than this one.

The Beer Bars of Loi Kroh Road

We hit some beer bars last night on Loi Kroh Road. This street feels a lot like Bangkok… sort of a Soi 22 feel to it. We planned on hitting several of the outdoor bars, but in the end we only spent time in one.

I became captivated by a girl with very dark skin and a beautiful smile. It happened that she spoke good English. I was sure she was an Isaan girl, so I asked her what province she was from. It turned out that she was Burmese, but had been in Thailand for about 7 years. She used to have an English boyfriend, which is why her English language was so good.

She sat on a barstool about 3 meters away while we chatted, and she was entertaining and amusing – a cheeky girl who I found to be very interesting. Finally, after about 30 minutes she came to sit with me. I was disappointed when I saw her up close to see that her skin was not really very clear, and that she wasn’t as pretty as I’d thought from a distance. Up to that point I’d been keen to try to take her home. I need to see the optometrist when I get back to Bangkok and update the prescription for my eyeglasses. At closing time, I let her leave with her friends instead of inviting her back to my place.

We ended up at the same after hours bar later, and she was nice enough to take me back to my hotel on her motorcycle, but I didn’t inviter her in. Nice girl though.

There was some excitement in the street while we were at this bar. A young white guy with his shirt off had a pool cue in his hand in the street and was taking on a Thai guy who was similarly armed. This was clearly gonna end in tears.

We watched, and it didn’t take long for the Thai guy to crack the farang across the head. The white guy went down, and in typical Thai style, everyone – men and women – rushed in to start kicking and hitting. I was only about three meters away, so my buddy & I, along with one or two other farang stepped in to hold the crowd back. We didn’t fight, just cleared people back and told them not to hurt the guy any more. My buddy managed to stop the Thai guy with the pool cue who was about to smash the farang across the head again. We sat the farang up, and for all his arrogant bluster of three minutes earlier, he was now a sad sight; unconscious with blood running down his face.

He’d been a prick, and deserved what he got from what I could see, so I didn’t feel bad for him, I simply didn’t want the Thais to hurt him too badly while he was down. My buddy was holding him up and asked what he thought we should do. The guy was in the middle of the street, so I suggested we put him on the sidewalk and leave him alone.

Just at that moment a cop showed up, so we left it to him to sort out. Ten minutes later the farang was up and moving, looking not much worse for the wear and tear, and walked away under his own power.

My Burmese girl said she’d known the beaten farang for five years, and that he was a constant troublemaker. She said that he got in fights all the time. She didn’t use the word ‘dickhead’ but it was clear what she thought of him.

After Hours

We’d heard from a few people that the after-hours scene was a club called ‘Spicy’ so we went there at 2 a.m. after the bars closed. It was packed elbow to asshole, with loud dance music playing. The drink service was pretty good. Even after just a couple of days in town I recognized a lot of the girls in the club from the bars I’d been in for two nights. The scene in this bar was high energy and fun. It was a meat market to rival any I’ve seen.

I took a run at a couple of girls but got shut down. I was getting tired and the alcohol was starting to wear me down, so I finally called it a night as the clock approached 4 a.m. and went back to my hotel.

The City of Chiang Mai

When I was here on my first trip two weeks ago I went to the night bazaar near Tha Pae gate on Sunday night. It was very very big and quite interesting – and this is coming from a man who hates markets – night, day or weekend variety. Today is Sunday again so I may go again. Chiang Mai has a regular night bazaar open every day, but it isn’t much different from the stalls that pop up on Sukhumvit Road every night. The Sunday Market is different and interesting… great for people watching, and lots of stuff to buy.

The ‘center city’ of Chiang Mai is interesting because it seems to be based on the original fortified city from several hundred years ago. There is a square moat – yes, and actual moat – and in many places you can still see portions of the original wall that protected the city inside the moat. I actually find it fascinating, and it’s attractive as well. At Tha Pae Road, the Tha Pae gate is (I think) the original entrance to the old city. The walls on each side of the gate are intact and run for 30 or 40 meters on each side.

Chiang Mai is a fairly compact city and easy to navigate. Fifteen minutes in a tuk tuk or sawn taew gets you across the city. I wrote a comment the other day saying that Chiang Mai isn’t Bangkok, and someone wrote in reply ‘vive la difference!’.

To quote Leonardo di Caprio: ‒I concur”.

Chiang Mai is a city that is much smaller than Bangkok, but there’s a lot happening here. In my opinion, Bangkok – like LA and other special cities – is a magnet for the most beautiful girls from around the country so it’s not as easy to find a beauty queen here, where Bangkok has a dozen in every train car every morning and evening Chiang Mai’s reputation as a Nirvana of tall, lovely light-skinned beauties seems to be unjustified, but it’s a nice city with plenty to do and enough girls that anyone can find the one they are looking for if you make the effort.

After four and a half days in the city I’m no expert on Chiang Mai, but I can report that I like it. I have two more days here, and I actually wish it was longer.

If you have a week to spare and you’re wondering how to spend it, one good option would be to come to Chiang Mai and get to know the city.

33 thoughts on “A First-Timer’s Look at Chiang Mai by Werewolf

  1. I totally agree.
    Chiang Mai is a fantastic city , and easily one of my favorite places in Thailand and the world, for that matter. I would happily live there, I think.

    However, it is not the greatest place to get some action. I never investigated the p4p scene, just the local night clubs (not that great of a scene). Perhaps it really is that much more conservative up there?

  2. Pretty much sums up my experience of Chiang Mai too. I first went in 1999 expecting the same from the women and was similarly underwhelmed.

    There are a few more places if you look about. There is a gogo type place in the courtyard that houses beer bars and Thai boxing on Loi Kroh Road where the lady drinks came in a glass barely larger than a thimble and girls dancing amongst a mock rainforest and waterfall – I know the bar is still there but not sure about the mock rainforest; probably been logged along with most of the real stuff.

    I have also found it fairly easy to chat up the girls in the cheap clothes shops on the top floor of the Central department store out towards the university.

  3. On “The Bangkok Effect” — At the Big Mango pre-opening I was talking to two frequent bloggers. When I mentioned that I don’t mind chubby girls with pretty faces they became disgusted. I was really surprised at their reaction. They would have nothing to do with any girl that is even a little over weight. They only wanted thin little brown fm’s. This is the Bangkok Effect. Guys get spoiled when they can chose and select. I guess it is kind of like a hot girl back in the real would – she can chose who ever she wants.

    Can’t blame the guys. Who doesn’t prefer a girl with a nice body. After over a year of living here, since I am married, I haven’t participated. Although, I have enjoyed the sites and venues. Been living vicariously through everyone else. Damn!

    WW: Every big city I have been in seems to have a disproportionate number of hotties. They are drawn to the city life. Also, ever notice the girls at major airport hubs? Great for people watching.

  4. @Munchmouth: I agree 100%. And would also add that I get bored with the same-same all the time. I do love my spinners, but some of my funnest nights have been with saucy little cherubs. Or pairs of mamasans. Or..ahem. Perhaps I’ve said too much.

  5. I went to Sayuri yesterday but didn’t like any of the girls on offer. (there were about a dozen girls in the fishbowl and about 4 Asian punters staring intently through the glass when I arrived). I ended up going back to the place I’d been the day before, looking for the beautiful L17, but she wasn’t working. I took the papasan’s advice on an attractive and full figured girl who did, indeed provide a good service, but it paled in comparison to the treatment I got 8 hours later from the go go bar waitress in my hotel room.

    We passed by Star Six while we were cruising around last night, but didn’t go in because every report I’d read on the internet said that it was the worst of the three go gos.

    In between the massage shop and the waitress I went for dinner and traditional Thai dance show at the Thailand Cultural Center.

    Today I went to the used bookstore and traded in novels I’d purchased two weeks ago for some additional titles today, then tried to rent a motorbike — I was thinking of riding up to see the mountaintop temple of Doi Suthep — but I stupidly left my passport in the hotel. Instead I got an afternoon breakfast at a cafe and started reading one of the books.

    Tonight will be with the waitress again; maybe I’ll try the temple tomorrow, but I have to leave Chiang Mai in the early afternoon, so it’ll have to be a morning trip if I go.

  6. WW – I live in CM and the Sunday night market is a great place to spot local talent. Yeah, CM’s not a great girl hotspot like BKK, but so what? My lifestyle in CM is 1000% better than it ever was in BKK, so good in fact I will never consider moving back to BKK.

    I know that service girl you are referring to, she really is a stunner and can be quite charming and a great actress in bed. I once spent a memorable night with her and her uni girl little sis… Sadly, I heard last week that she will be leaving soon as there apparently is an ongoing problem with some of her ST customers actually coming back to the bar to complain, and she has been asked repeatedly to adjust her attitude with the other staff. Yeah, I’ve seen her acting stuck-up at times, but she has always been super nice to me tho.

    Don’t know if you got to Hotshot or Bubble this trip, but they’re worth a look. Spicy rules the after-hours market, but only because there are no viable alternates 🙁

  7. I hear you about the ‘BKK effect’ and the ‘LA effect.’ A good friend of mine moved to LA 3 years ago and she can’t get a date. She’s cute as a button, a part time fitness instructor, and a generally wonderful person. But she’s a brunette in her mid-30s and about 5’6″ and she’s swimming in a sea of 5’10” 22 year old blonds with after-market boobs. Tough town.

    @ Milo – you and me both. Brazil!!!

    Thanks for the CM writeup. I’ve been promising my Thai friends that next time I’m in Thailand I’ll make the trip up there. They all speak of it just as you have.

  8. I also really liked Chiang Mai while I was there. Spent 5 days there a couple of years ago and wished it were longer. Very easy to get around, very nice people, girls were average (like you said), the bars of Loi Kroh road are very small but fun. The night bazaar is huge. The city center is surrounded by a wall and a moat.

    If you have never been there, I suggest spending a week and enjoying walking around.

  9. I agree.

    EVERYONE should go to CM immediately.

    I’ll take care of the (Soi 4) ranch.

    P.S. Getting involved (in any way) in a fight between Thais and a farang. That’s not good advice is it?

  10. @ Milo – never been to Brazil, only dated a few of her lovely daughters, who other than the completely accurate stereotype of them having serious tempers are wonderful. There’s a whole section of Queens that is almost a little Sao Paulo, and some good sized neighborhoods in Brooklyn as well.

    Am working on a trip to Buenos Aires for August but it’s 50/50 at this point. The world is not helping me take a week off. Choppy markets = boss gets flustered = tosh gets lots of work and yelled at if I don’t do it quickly. I’ll report back if anything works out.

  11. Yeah I hear the girls in Buenos are, excuse my Spanish, buenas, if a bit more stuck up than the Brazil chicas. Good luck with the trip…

  12. Great write up. Glad I don’t have this “Bangkok Syndrome” sounds like its sucks.
    I anyone know anything at all about Khon Kean. Looks like I might have to spend a bit of time there and I dont want it to suck.

    I think its a scientific impossibility for a girls ass to big fat.

  13. yesman: you should head to Chiang Mai to meet the girl of your dreams (spotlight #38).

    BTW, the girl of MY dreams is from Khon Kaen… talked to her last night and she says she’s waiting for me to get back to BKK. Given that she’s NOT a bargirl, I found this to be pretty exciting news. Eight days and counting…

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  18. been living here for years now. these girls fuck for money, and thats all they do it for.their forced into it by poverty and will marry the first farang who can get them out of that job.its not their fault, its how it is. as for haggling over the price. your just reducing the service provided. check out the japanese.generous tippers and allways get the attention of the girls. try it some time.it works. if you cant afford it, go home and come back when youve made your money.
    give them what they want, and they will give you what you want.

  19. getreal dude: Not sure what the fuck you are on about talking about “haggling over price”. I re-read the post top to bottom and had a peruse of the comments… no discussion of haggling about anything that I spotted. If you can afford it, go back to school and come back when you can read for comprehension.

  20. heee heee!
    you tell ’em wolf!
    BTW, your absolutely right. Maybe it’s a case of non-pen fold word salad except on the intake side?

  21. Lurcher,

    I imagine some of those that live in CM will be able to add some more useful info, but I’ve been back 4 or 5 times since I wrote the above piece, the most recent trip being in July this year. On those trips, little had changed. Unlike my experience of Bangkok, where restaurants, bars and other businesses seem to open and close with regularity, CM seems more stable and predictable.

    I have only been there a half dozen times over three years, but it’s not a huge town, and my take on it remains very much the same as my very first time there. It’s got a small-town feel, but it’s big enough to offer a variety of things to do; especially if you don’t mind hitting some of the venues that are primarily “Thai” rather than farang-oriented.

    On one of my trips I did get ripped off in a karaoke bar where I was charged nearly double what I should have been. I managed to negotiate the bill back to nearly what it should have been and get out without getting skinned alive, so it pays to be cautious as well. The name of the place that tried to rip me off was, from memory, “Vegas” and it was just a kilometer or two from one corner of the old city wall (Northeast I believe). I wrote a long blog and posted it at the time, but it is no longer available.


  22. If You Enjoy Women As Part Of Your Nightly Entertainments Don`t waste your time in Chiang Mai

    If like me a girl is a main part of your nightly entertainments in Thailand, than a visit to Chiang Mai is going to be disappointing. I know, I have lived here for the last 25 years.

    Over the last few years, all of Chiang Mai`s brothels, daytime and nighttime have been closed down and levelled.

    Due to Chiang Mai`s ever dwindling numbers of tourists and bored ex-pats, most of the women workers in massage parlours average ages between late 30s to mid 50s plain and ugly, few lookers, have begun offering hand jobs to help supplement their income. Sounds good but many insist of no touching, no nudity on their part, no kissing, no nothing. For a happy ending they try to push for 500 baht but I never offer more than 300 baht, that’s not including the massage. This after a while has become boring and one would get more satisfaction from just having a wank and cheaper too.

    The few soapy massages left in Chiang Mai are total rip-offs. Very clinical, no kissing allowed, lots of tissues and the sex inhibited. Cannot be compared in anyway shape or form to the soapys in Bangkok. They charge whatever they think the customer is dumb enough to pay and get it over with a.s.a.p, no thrills, no massage and lookers few and far between.

    Than there is the limited bar scene, now mostly all clumped together in one street, the Loi Kroh road. Nothing much elsewhere.

    The BGs there are uniformly ugly. Not young, not old, average age perhaps around 30ish, but ugly. They have misshapen bodies and ugly faces; the lookers which are few and far between, make no impression at all, they are indifferent and inert. This seems to be a characteristic of this place.

    At first impressions they seem fun to be around with, full of compliments, kindnesses, praises and agreeable noises; they are good fondlers at first; that is the bait to catch you, but they won’t keep you waiting long before the pressure begins to make you buy drinks and the subject of money is brought to your attention. If bar fined and in the bed you will discover that they have low libidos, low stamina, poor apparatus, mental reservations, and non-existent foreplay techniques. The mission of the women is to get the men plied up with as much booze as possible, as this is the main benefits of their business, big profits on drinks.

    All nude, semi nude and sex shows are banned in Chiang Mai. Even the old familiar Hello Welcome has been banned. So if visiting a bar don`t expect to find anything more than you would see in a normal open bar or drinking establishment.

    If you do pull in one of the girls from the limited venues or bar establishments in Chiang Mai it`s going to cost you dear with no satisfaction guarantees. Gone are the days of the lady houses and the 400 baht quickies or the back street specials. These no longer exist in Chiang Mai, nowhere. Now it`s either the bar ritual or nothing. Bar ritual meaning, drinks, bar fine, maybe hotel room and short time.

    I’m not gay but know a man who is. And if you’re into the gay scene don`t expect to find any bargain basements there either. A man massage in Chiang Mai can cost you a minimum of 400 baht per hour and they expect from 600 baht to 1000 plus baht tips. I have never seen male massagers in non-gay massage establishments, if so extremely rare.

    During the night the streets around the centre of Chiang Mai city are infested with hideous freaky travesties. Some can be quite aggressive and best avoided. The police have cleared most of the freelance girls that used to inhabit the discos and the same goes for street girls. There are still some street girls to be had, if you know where to look, normally hiding in the shadows somewhere. But these are filthy, many have mental problems and diseases. There are lots of police in that area and some of the street girls are under aged, jail bait. So beware the police are just waiting to pounce on some naïve Farang involving underaged sex workers even if the girl looks older and the guy unaware.

    The big Chiang Mai clamp down perpetrated by the powers that be, now have the business firmly under their control. So if you enjoy women with your wine and song, you will be disappointed in Chiang Mai.

    Otherwise, for the temples and shopping it`s great.

  23. Respectfully, I think you’re wrong. I just got from a week in Chiang Mai – I had first gone there in ’82, then in 91′, then in 2004. (an old fart) Remember that, like Cowboy, Patpong, and Pattaya, lot’s of the girls in the bars come from Issan in the northeast – where they aren’t so tall. There is certainly an abundance of surprisingly tall, willowy, lighter skinned women, but you’ll have to go to Big C, Tesco/Lotus, or one of the malls to really see them – not the bars or massage places in the one km square of the ancient city. ….. It’s all good.

  24. @Bored in Chiang Mai. I can’t believe we live in the same city as that is not my experience at all. I go into town several times a week and have generally found the bar staff at most establishments to be friendly and accommodating. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and, as everywhere, there are some less attractive women around, but still plenty of more than acceptable ones. John Leonard is right, too, in saying to look elsewhere – around the uni’s for example.

  25. You look quite ignorant about Thailand ,dude.
    CHiang Mai has in average more sunny days than in Bangkok, cooler nights don’t count in less tanning.
    People are wither because they are mixed with Burmese, Chinese and many other different Hill Tribes. They have Thai nationalities (not all of them, because some Hill Tribes are not recognized) but genetically are different from other Thai people.
    Southern Thai also look very different, darker and with more round eyes.
    About the beauty, almost allover Thailand girls are more beautiful than most of other asian (and non asian) countries, but Bangkok-effect apart, I think Korat,Surin and Udon Thani girls are very pretty (and hot !).

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