Back in the hood…

Back from the UK Miss Tim and I headed straight home to HH for a bit of much needed sleepy time.

Being on a tight schedule we only had a few days to make the rounds in HH. Hitting Elmurphys for a few cheeky vodkas we headed off to the London Bar. I don’t really like it much in there – but it was heaving with lots of people having fun. Most people in there are older than time itself, so we mooched off to ‘Click’ bar. Out of all the bars in HH, this one (for me and all the under 40’s) has the best music. Good noisy hip-hop booming out. It wasn’t long before Miss Tim and I were downing Jaegermiester and dancing around to Eminem. Good to get the blood pumping!

I may have said once or twice in the past that I am not a fan of live music. I am sorry, but I can’t think of one live band that can sing songs better than the original artist. But, I guess it’s what (older) people like in HH as most bars seem to have them.

Out of Click after a couple more shots we headed to the Beer House. Or House of Beer. Or someones house who had beer. Not really too sure. It’s the one at the Hilton Hotel. As far as I know, this is the place that stays open the latest and is where most people end up each night. So if there are Farangs there, then there is also Freelancers! 😉

The entry was 200bht each and with that you get a free drink. I assume the entrance fee was to pay for the live band. Doh.

Inside was pretty busy. We spied an old guy who we saw several months back. The guy must be late 60’s/70’s and was dressed like a teenager and dancing to all the dance/trance music. Still going. – poor bastard! When that music comes on, I feel old and make a move to the drinking table. I just look stupid dancing to that crap. This old guy was on a mission to convince the girls he was not as old as their grandparents. Good luck to him!

As found in most places these days, a couple of scantily clad girls came up to us selling shots. It’s always a good idea at the time (when you’re drunk) so we had a few. And that was the last I remember of that night! We don’t remember leaving, we don’t remember calling our driver and we don’t remember making (Heinz) beans on toast. – We found the remains in the morning.

The plan for the next morning was to relax by the pool for a few hours and then head to Bangkok. Our driver was picking us up at 3pm.

It was far too bright and sunny outside so instead I just laid on the sofa and drank bottles of water and wondered who ate all my beans. Miss Tim played the ‘jet-lag’ card and stayed in bed.

We made some breakfast (lunch) and all was well. Except 10 mins later Miss Tim had her head in the toilet and was throwing it all up. Knowing there was nothing I could do, I genuinely wished her well soon and fired up the PlayStation.

After the time it took for me to complete stage 2 on my game, I lovingly went to check up on Miss Tim who was still hugging the toilet. She was upset. Not at being hungover, but upset about her food now being lost to the toilet gods.

Arriving in Bangkok at 6pm we headed straight for Mulligans on Soi 11. We like the food there and also sitting at those big beer barrel tables out the front. A nice venue. A quick bite to eat before we were joined by Lomeo & Juliet, GamblinMan and my NYC pal and his girlfriend. Time to hit the drink!

A few hours of drinking at Mulligans we thought we’d head to Big Dogs. My new NYC pal was not impressed with his drink and suspected they forgot to add the alcohol. We tried another drink to see if it was a one-off but it wasn’t. Sad really. With the prices only ever going up it seems the quality only goes down.

Out of Big Dogs with no tip, we headed for Bar 4. No space for us at the front of the bar as there were girls there on their phones and looking at themselves in the mirror. More drinks were ordered whilst Miss Tim and I slipped away to check up on the construction at the Mango 😉 More news on that later!

Back at Bar 4 we talked about the next bar to go to. With the Mango being several weeks away from serving us cheap drinks, we decided the only place left is the Plaza.

Aussie John arrived and was already on the way to being plastered. The more the merrier!
As it was more than an hour since Miss Tim last ate – the girls decided to go eat some noodles somewhere.

It’s been a while since I trawled along soi 4. Well… a few months. There doesn’t seem much going on to get me excited about going there these days.

Into the Plaza….

First up was Pretty Lady. Or Spellbound as it is now called. What a disaster! Only about 3 girls on the stage. One drink and out. What used to be a great night in there was now a nightmare. All that money spent for the changes doesn’t seem to have paid off. What I think would be a good idea is to allocate all the money they plan to invest on the re-fit, to the girls and drink promotions. They’ll pull the customers and get people spending.

Out of there we went off to see our mate DavetheRave. AW was packed and not a seat in the house so we headed elsewhere. – Straps!

Man alive…. I wasn’t too keen on this place, but Lomeo was with us, so what you gonna do? A few drinks and a look at the Ladyboys – we headed back to AW. It was still busy so DtR suggested we all go and check out Wild Thing, formerly Las Vegas and probably soon to be something else.

On the way to WT, we made a quick detour to Rainbow 4 (I think) as Aussie Jon and GM knew a girl there. (where don’t they?)

It wasn’t long before Aussie John was sniffing the poles that one of the girls was sliding up and down on, so we decided to head to WT.

Apparently there have been re-fits and re-branding but I don’t really see how it’s different from when it first opened a few years back? The same layout. A big stage with tier seating. Infact, what they should do is swap the Anglewitch Venue with WT venue. Good idea or what? There will then be seating for all the AW fans and WT might actually look full? Someone have a word with Dave on that!

I know I’ve said this before – but Dave is a great asset to the Nana group as he is sooo enthusiastic about the gogo bars. He see’s the bright side in all of it. Unfortunately, I am getting to be a bitter old man and getting far too used to it all.

WT is half Coyote and half gogo-dancers if I am not mistaken. I am not really a fan of coyote’s as there never seems to be much interaction with the punters. They spend most of their time looking at themselves in the mirror – or at the Japanese.

One thing I did notice was that the vodka & coke I was given was undrinkable. Now, my 1st thought would be to leave and never go back. But, a lot of these bar managers are under pressure to keep costs down so I can understand when they try out cheaper quality booze. Its when the really big, busy bars are pushing cheap booze that I get really pissed about. That’s just greedy. Anyway, I mentioned it to Dave, who agreed the drink was just plain nasty and went and changed it for a different vodka. Great. So, if you do happen across some drink that you get and it tastes worst than the devils piss – you should mention it to the manager/bar tender so they know. If they get enough complaints I am sure they’ll do something about it.

Again, Aussie John was climbing the poles and with all of us looking and pointing at him, he decided it was time to go, but not before he spoke at great length to Lomeo about something. Lomeo turned to me and said “Oey naw hease a blaaady Yozzie an awl… bat oey caant andastaaand a blaaaady thing hease saaayin”

Time to go John.

GM was keeping quiet. Many girls came over to him. Sat with him… spoke in his ears whilst he nodded and smiled. I can only guess at the conversations. Something like…”three girls at Rainbow are now driving a Mercedes Benz.. was that you?”

By this time the girls had joined us and Juliet was straight onto Lomeo for having a good time. His minutes in the plaza were now numbered.

Time becomes a bit of a blur after that. I think we may have headed for BillBoard and not gone in as it was empty…. Off to Anglewitch to see if there were any seats.

We’d lost Aussie John and Romeo & Juliet had decided it was best that Lomeo was promise he’d never return to the plaza again. Ever.

I have noticed on the odd occasion that Lomeo has a little chat to himself. Oh I know he tries to hide it, but I observe everything. I think what he is saying to himself is ‘Lomeo, don’t be silly now… don’t look at the pretty ladies….. Juliet will find out…….no good will come of it…..she’s not a she….. and the like. Infact, He reminds me of those little talking dolls that have the string in the back that repeat the same phrases!

AW had our usual seats at the stage. Luckily we were just in time to make the shows!
We had a drink with Dave and ordered some of that Blackcurrant shot stuff. If you’ve never had it – then do so. It’s the easiest shot you can ever sling down your neck. Blackcurrant and schnapps. Tastes good and doesn’t screw your face up!

And that was about as much as I can remember of that night. I don’t remember leaving the plaza and I don’t remember making I back to the hotel.

Oh, just to mention the hotel…. We stay at the Citadines next to and on top of Mulligans on soi 11. I think it’s a great room. Bedroom area with a partition to make a separate lounge area and kitchen.

The TV is wall mounted on a runner which can be moved from the bedroom (area) to the lounge area. Good idea. I think it’s called an exec room or something, and costs under 2000 which is pretty good. When we look for hotels, we first choose the location over the price. The location was great.

Next morning and another sore head for Miss Tim and I. We had to get up by lunchtime as Jonas was on the way! Normally, when Jonas joins us it means things are going to get messy. However, this time Jonas was being sensible and brought his car so that he couldn’t get smashed and end up at Nana Thai mansion. Again.

Ready for a spot of lunch we headed to the Firehouse – as recommended by Lomeo. The man knows his food, so we were paying attention.

If you’ve not been to the Firehouse – its well worth a look. The burgers are pretty damn good.

The problem with stuffing your face is that you need a nap afterwards so we headed back to the hotel – stopping in for a few drinks on the way!

With a few drinks inside us – Jonas made the wise decision to go home before people ended up getting hurt!

No time for a nap – we headed over to Sathorn to ‘The M Pub’. This pub is situated at the Ascott Hotel and is managed by the one and only Kwan. One of the many she is in charge of. We looked over the new design of the new Mango Bar and the new theme. I am excited about this little project. I’ll write more about this later when it’s nearing the launch date.

Time was running out as I had to catch a plane to Africa to do some ‘roustabouting’ (apparently).

Time for a quick drink at Hanrahans with GM, Aussie John and Lomeo. Apparently Hiliary bar beer prices go up at 8pm to 170bht? Is that right? Could be more? Anyway, there is a deal in Hanrahans for an ice bucket with 5 bottled beer for a cheap price. Can’t remember the deal. I am sure Lomeo can tell us.

Mind you, I think the main reason for Lomeo ordering the bucket of beer with ice was so he could rest his Evander Holyfield like ears, after the chewing Juliet gave him last night.

A couple of cheeky vodkas was all I could manage before I had to go to the airport.

Back to work for me for another month. I am just sitting in my local bar having a coffee whilst I type this. Not a bad view.

People don't realize how tough my job is.
People don’t realize how tough my job is.

11 thoughts on “Back in the hood…”

  1. Speaking of cheap drinks, the renamed (again) “Mai Peng Disco” (Nana Liquid) advertises 99 baht drinks and beers on their flyers, anyone been there recently?

    I think the buckets in Hanrahans were 420 baht for 5 beers from memory. You can mix and match whatever beers you want from quite a good choice and they are available until midnight.

  2. Geez .. Yes one side effect of the demon drink is that those voices in my head have been known to escape. GM spot on with the pricing, a great ‘bucket’ deal.

    3 weeks off the grog starting today. Body run down and needs a rest .. Take care of that barstool for me!

  3. Great write up Graham. You sure pack a lot in! Am thinking of checking out Hui Hin as an alternative to Phuket/Bangers/Pattaya. Guess the bar scene is a lot less full on than the aforementioned. Where was that pic taken?

  4. Kaufman, you are correct, the nightlife in HH is not as hectic as Phuket/BKK/Patts – but I think it has a certain charm of it’s own. You won’t find the wannabe millionaires there, bad tattooed Singha vest wearing scumbags and sidewalks full of market stalls.

    The beaches are fantastic, the restaurants are great and the prices are very reasonable.

    However, if you’re going there looking for a girl, you may want a back-up plan.

    For Tim and I, there is always something to do!

    As for the picture… Luanda The most expensive city in the world!

    1. Hi Graham. Thanks for the take on HH. Sounds like a good place to live/chill out in. I think a Thai beach resort without available women might be a step to far me though! Mind you if it is free of the tribes of frumpy over weight western women who have invaded Phuket like a plague of zombies over the last couple of years it is still be appealing!

  5. I happened along to check out the ‘M’ Bar a couple of times. Late December saw blue tarpaulins draped over the frontage. Late January saw the blue tarpaulins still in place but a bit of plank sticking out as well. Progressing well 😉

    1. Doc, I’ll let the new owners know that you are not impressed with their progress.

      I am sure the thought of missing out on those Orange Juice sales will be all the encouragement they need to speed things up.

  6. I was in LOS last week and strolled down Soi Mango to look at the Tarpaulin and scaffolding having just visited the Mama San at Charming Massage to discuss my selection for the evening. re The Pretty Lady Disaster conversion. I agree but just assumed it had been closed down after a police raid last summer cos’ it was too raunchy and a few positive piss tests.. Whatever, the replacement is very poor and not fun.
    re Crap Liquor in mixers: I order the spirits first, check it, then order the mixer. That way if you’re having Sam Song and Red Bull you get the full tin of Red Bull.
    re Drinking on the Plaza. I like the place above Lucky Lukes, the location of the original BM bar and currently a ST hotel but with good bar on the balcony. I will be visiting BKK and HH in March.
    re Regarding old folks dancing if you’ve ever lived in Brixton or Moss Side and hung out in the all night Shabeens and Blues you will always see the old Jamaicans dancing but to Reggae, Ska and Dub……..Now that’s what I call music. Music to jerk and sway to. But I feel uneasy even queezy watching white men dance.

    1. Good tip from Lurcher there when ordering drinks. The Lurcher has been in Pretty Lady many times during its hay-day of fun. Hell, I know I have. It’s a shame that it came to and end, but then all good things do!

      Not heard much from the owners of the new M-Bar. Last I heard it’d be ready for my visit next week. Having said that, when have you ever believed a Thai estimate?

    2. That bar you mention is the aptly named “Balcony Bar” – very imaginative, those thais.

  7. I was in Spellbound (formerly Pretty Lady) last week and there were a lot of new girls in there, many quite good looking.

    I agree that the fun element has gone as there are only a few girls left there from even as recently as 3 months ago. I think G will only know one girl in there…

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