People are Strange, when you’re a…… normal person

Nothing happening of late – been back at work for a few weeks and only a few to go.

I ‘should’ be starting to feel and excited about going home soon – and I am. I can’t wait. It’s not that I am excited about getting home and relaxing by the pool, I am excited about going home and sitting by the pool where there is no one else near me.

People piss me off. I know everyone is different, but why do people have to be annoying, rude and pretty much fucking revolting?

I have come to the conclusion that I am near perfect. I have also come to the conclusion that I hate and don’t want to know anyone who does the following..

  • Eat / Chew foot with their mouth open.
  • Have the TV on so loud that the person in the next room can hear it
  • Not flush the toilet
  • Make noises like a fucking pig and then gob the contents of their nose onto the pavement or in a sink – near me
  • Walk slowly – while texting on their phone
  • Hold their phone infront of their face – even when not using FaceTime
  • Using loudspeaker when no need
  • Banging cutlery onto crockery when eating (that means the food has gone)
  • Breath through their nose when it makes a noise like a werewolf
  • Make noises when drinking
  • Stand so close to me in a queue that you’re touching me
  • Doesn’t refill the kettle when you’ve just emptied it – in the office kitchen
  • Follows me round a shop – commenting on everything I look at.
  • Drive so close behind another car that you can see their speedometer.
  • Have bad breath.
  • Get up out of your seat and walk to the front of the plane as its still hurtling down the runway at great speed
  • Be rude to air cabin crew
  • Use Twitter and Facebook to talk to each other
  •  Anyone who types ‘lol’ at anything.  Ever.
  • Walk though the x-ray machine at the airport with your phone and keys still in your pocket
  • And last of all… for today anyway, the people who’s phone rings in a cinema.

I don’t do any of that and I find the people who think this is acceptable behavior need a kick up the arse.

But apart from that, I am in a pretty good mood.

Carry on.

th

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My dream.....
My dream…..

 

 

10 thoughts on “People are Strange, when you’re a…… normal person”

  1. You for got about the people with backyards that have abandoned, bored dogs that seem to bark for no reason other than to test if they are still able!

    1. Ah yeah… the barking dogs. Basts.

      I found out that the dog next door barks at the Gardeners.

      For some reason – the Garden people are down our road EVERYDAY walking back and forth. They’ve spent more time in my garden than I have.

      I have instructed Miss Tim to tell them to not ‘appear’ in the mornings as that’s my quiet time by the pool.

  2. I am all the things you hate but not all the time and not all at the same time. It’s called humanity and yes it’s not perfect. I am sure you do the same things otherwise you are a fucking machine running on almost depleted batteries.
    Thx for wasting my time, i hate THAT. 🙂

    1. Harry… it’s not humanity. It’s certain kinds of people in humanity. I lower-class of scumbag.

      You eat with your mouth open? You don’t flush the toilet? Really?

      I don’t. If that makes me a machine.. then I can live with that. An Awesome Machine!! 🙂

      1. I suppose I am just lower class then. You are right
        that that behaviour is not normal.

        But my real intention was not my comment, i just wanted to join in you because you are my hero.

  3. I don’t even eat chicken feet let alone my own!

    I’ll add one from today. Dickheads who recline their seats, on a 55 minute flight, prior to take off! Put it up after I complain to aircrew, then down again a minute later. FFS!

    As Thai’s aren’t the best at conflict resolution they moved me to a better seat. The squeaky wheel always gets oiled!

    Who remembers when air travel was fun? It ain’t anymore.

  4. I hate the dickheads that use their mobile on speaker in the airport or airline lounge – Giving the ‘ol stink-eye doesn’t seem to work. So I just walk up near them speaking into own phone and saying random shit like “It looks like you have Gonorrhea, sir.” or “You do know that’s a Ladyboy, right?” – if they don’t shut up, at least they move away from the area.

    1. I was walking past the line at my grocery this week and this fat bitch was yacking away on her phone. When I rounded the next aisle she was still going so I walked right up side her and let loose some evil bowl funk! Fucking gassed her proper and then sauntered away back to my shopping!

      1. Nice!

        There is a guy here.. I think he is Algerian… he stands outside shouting into his phone (in Arabic) while waving his hands around. I really want to ask him 1) why is he shouting? and 2) why wave his hands around? The other person can’t see him.

        The more I think about it, the more I think there is no one on the other end of the phone. He is just trying to make himself look busy and important.

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