How hard can it be?

The weather in HH is pretty crap right now. This gives me a little time to sit on the internet and do a little research in my pursuit of happiness.

There are few things I need to be a happy little bunny in Hua Hin.

Nice house,  pool, not too far from the town center,  a car and a bike.  Simple.   I am sure I am not alone.  After all,  I’d have thought most if not all Farrangs living here would want the same. – House and transport.

So why do the Thai’s make it so bloody difficult to find either?

Lets start with the housing.  I have yet to find a house where the neighbours are not complete and utter selfish wankers.  They all seem to have dogs which are left outside all day – who like to bark.  Why do they bark?  Well, on all the estates I’ve lived on, there are gardeners and pool cleaners walking about all day – in and out of gardens at their leisure.  My current bunch of gardeners seem to spend more time in my garden than me.  Not sure what it is they are claiming to be doing, as whenever I see them, they are sitting in the shade and gazing into their phones.

So why have a dog?  I keep hearing its for security.  Now, there may have been a time whereby if a dog barked, it would raise alarm and people would investigate. But now?  No one cares.  It’s just another dog left alone in a garden barking at the pool cleaner.  In fact,  dressing up as a pool cleaner would be a good cover for burglar.  When the Thai’s get wind of that idea,  I’ll expect to see a news report on Stickboy of a pool cleaner getting caught for Burglary.. in a condo.

Getting back on point…..   How do you find a house?   The internet of course.  It is after all 2017.

Sounds easier than it is.  Not one of the Real Estate Agents (in HH) has a decent website.  At best, all you can do is search on a house or condo within a price range.  There are no filters, advace searches or boxes to check.  The photos are terrible and the content is shite.  The house I was living in has never been off the site – even though I had a 1 year lease.    Each time I inquired about a house advertised, I was told the house was rented out – but they conveniently had details on another house, which was completely different to the type of houses I was interested in.  I don’t get it.  Miss Tim said the Agents like to keep as much content on the site as possible – as it makes them look good.   I tried explaining that any normal person with half a brain doesn’t think like that.  After being disappointed a few times, I then leave that site and go somewhere else.   When will Thai’s realize that if they advertise houses that they actually have available – then people might actually do business with them.

Pisses me right off.   These people really are dumb.  Annoyingly,  a lot of these Agents have a Farrang in the Leadership/Management team.   Surely they could raise the point of saying “lets put a status on the houses we have advertised as ‘available’ or ‘unavailable’  – so that people don’t waste theirs and our time”?

So instead of what would be a simple and easy process is made into a painful long one.  I have bought many properties in the UK.  Found in the internet after a simple search and then then bought.  Easy.

Instead,  I have to enter into many conversations with the Agents – give them my requirements – and they’ll then come up with a bunch of properties that are completely different to what I want.

I now let Miss Tim do it.  As I will at some point call them all a bunch off fucking clowns who have no idea what they’re doing.

Now, Miss Tim and I have to get on a bike and ride around Hua Hin, looking at new housing estates, peeking over walls and through gates to see where the houses are that we like – and then ask security if any are available.   We also get to see if there are any bloody dogs around as we peek over fences.  Good job we’re in our Pool Cleaning uniform.

Our house hunt continues.   We’ve a few months to go.

So if anyone knows of a Pool Villa,  3 bed for upto 60k per month – please let me know.  No dogs nearby though.

Next up is transportation.    Once I have a house, I need to get to and from it.  Easy right?  Wrong.

I don’t want to go traipsing round all the bloody show-rooms, asking for a price – and then spending the next half hour of them telling you of all the different deals on offer.  I like to go to their website and compare models and prices.     Why is it none of the dealers have prices displayed on their windows?

This is for bikes and cars.   Again, back in Farangland, I have bought many, many cars and bikes from dealers – using only the internet.

It’s easy.   Go to the website,  enter in the search criteria and bam.. the results are displayed.  Click on a few buttons and it’s done.

I really can’t believe the Thai’s here do not have the technology to do this.  They have.  What they don’t have – is the brains and know-how about implementing such a new concept.

I have searched for Bike/Car websites.   Looking for a car and a bike.    Nothing is easy.

Picked up a new bike the other day – which was purchased only because we happened to ride past it the other week and it caught my eye.  After searching the internet for their website to get details (and failing), Miss Tim went into the shop to find out all about it.  – then bought it.

So my point it?

Spend a bit of money in developing a website.  It doesn’t have to be fancy – just give pertinent information on the products you are wanting to sell.  It’s not rocket science.

Half the bloody country is full of ‘IT’ experts – surely there is one out there who can come up with a plan?  They could even wave their fee – for a commission on each sale done through the website?

There are many, many opportunities.

Until then,  I’ll just keep bitching and moaning about riding round the streets all day looking for a bloody house with no dogs or termites.

7 thoughts on “How hard can it be?”

  1. No dogs OR termites? Fussy bugger, aint ya, Graham?

    Keep up the good work and ranting….most entertaining for this former Mangoite….

  2. I dont envy the Westerner searching for property rentals / purchases in Thailand, it all sounds extremely unprofessional, trying and a nightmare.

    Timewasting agents, legal viper pits, constantly moving goalposts……you have to be brave and thick-skinned to invest in real estate Siam-side.

    I split my time betweeno short-time hotels and police cells……

    1. Can’t see me ever buying a place here. Crap build quality. Houses / estates seem to go to shit after a few years.

      Come to think of it – I don’t know one person who has successfully bought a place and his happy with it.

      I know one guy – had a nice house built in Pattaya… large pool etc. He is now renting it out and living with his girlfriends family up in Shitsville… So they can save money for HER future.

      Londons calling….. a few years left and I am then done here

  3. Renting is definitely the way to go. Have never understood why anyone would buy, okay maybe if you have children and its a legacy to them. Short time rooms, Police cells and under the BTS stairs definitely seems the way to go.

    1. Exactly right! It’s so much easier just paying the rent – not having to worry about furniture and all that kind of crap.

      Then each year – just move somewhere else after the neighborhood puts a petition together to get you moved out.

  4. Graham,
    I have another comment (moan) from a grumpy old man about life here in Bangkok. Today for about the fourth time in past three weeks, I had another taxi driver who either did not know how to use the gears properly on his car, or had a car lacking some gears.
    The first guy about three weeks ago, wanted to go fast in first and then instead of putting on the brakes, could just take his foot off the accelerator and have everybody in the car lurch around. Then when he got the speed up, he went into third gear. I realized that he obviously didn’t have second on there, but of course going from first into third and dropping revs and then planting the foot down, made us all lurch around again. Then when we were in third and he had to slow down, he was doing this in third and then as were in low revs, he would put the foot down again and then take it off.

    I kid you not, I actually felt seasick on bloody Sukhumvit road.

    Today the guy seemed just too lazy to bother changing the gears so just let the revs build up and then drop off again. He was a nice guy, talking to the wife about local sights. I did not want to open my mouth in case I lost my lunch.

    There are lots of good things about Thailand and Bangkok but cars, driving habits and road courtesy (or lack of) are not some of my favourite things.

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